Peacemakers among them

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Priesthood Session of the April 2011 Conference.

I loved Elder Eyring's talk, "Learning in the Priesthood." I always feel like advice for serving righteously with the priesthood is so pertinent for serving righteously in motherhood as well. His advice for quorums seems perfectly suited for families:

Wherever I have seen remarkable learning in the priesthood, there are those bonds of love. Again I have seen it as both a cause and an effect of learning gospel truths. Love invites the Holy Ghost to be present to confirm truth. And the joy of learning divine truths creates love in the hearts of people who shared the experience of learning.

The reverse is true as well. Discord or jealousy inhibits the ability of the Holy Ghost to teach us and inhibits our ability to receive light and truth. And the feelings of disappointment that invariably follow are the seeds of greater discord and faultfinding among those who expected a learning experience that did not come.

So much of our family life is about learning—or at least trying to learn—together. And I DO find it so hampered by discord or contention! I wish I could find a way to get the children to feel the need for those "bonds of love" like I do!

I was also thinking about the idea of unity—specifically in relation to the Quorum of the Twelve, as we were reading instructions to those priesthood quorums in the Come Follow Me lesson this week—but also in families. I have written before about unity and how daunting I find it (there are few other ideals I feel like our world is further from right now) so this insight of Elder Eyring's actually felt astonishing to me:

The priesthood holders who learn well together always seem to me to have great peacemakers among them. You see peacemaking in priesthood classes and in councils. It is the gift to help people find common ground when others are seeing differences. It is the peacemaker’s gift to help people see that what someone else said was a contribution rather than a correction.

With enough of the pure love of Christ and a desire to be peacemakers, unity is possible in priesthood councils and in classes. It takes patience and humility, but I have seen it happen even when issues are difficult and the people in councils or classes come from vastly different backgrounds.

I think I had never thought before that a few peacemakers sprinkled in among all of us flawed mortals could actually create unity by heading off contention or misunderstanding right when it starts. I have always envisioned the Twelve talking about issues so carefully and lovingly and never really even wanting to be dis-unified, making it easy for them to reach consensus. And for all I know that IS how it is for them. BUT, in a regular old ward council or presidency meeting or Relief Society, there are always awkward moments of disagreement and even annoyance. You can definitely feel the Spirit leave the room during those times, but it didn't occur to me that someone from the class could step in and bring the Spirit back by helping foster understanding. I love what he says about "the peacemaker's gift" of helping people see each others' contributions and appreciate them as such, rather than getting defensive and uncomfortable the moment differences of opinion become apparent. 

Now that I think about it, I have actually had experience doing this among certain of my children, and it can be quite exhausting, frankly—quickly jumping in to head off argument or soften careless words before anyone gets too offended. But it does lead to more peaceful interactions, if you can keep up. I like the idea of becoming a more expert and accomplished peacemaker—just as President Nelson has urged us to—and then going around defusing tense situations like an army of bomb defusers. I love the idea of not just hoping unity will happen spontaneously (it doesn't, in my experience) but fostering it, nurturing it, creating it. Of helping, by our very presence, to bring the light and love of Christ to any situation in which we find ourselves. Doesn't that seem like exactly the kind of army our world needs right at this moment?

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Flecks of gospel gold

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Afternoon Session of the April 2011 Conference. 

Lots of good stuff in this session. I have always liked President Oaks' talk on Desire. But what stuck out to me this week was President Ballard's comments on finding joy. He told the story of the young man who was looking for gold and couldn't find any for years and years. He was about to give up in despair when an old man gave him some advice:

The old prospector said, “Son, it seems to me you are so busy looking for large nuggets that you’re missing filling your pouch with these precious flecks of gold. The patient accumulation of these little flecks has brought me great wealth.”…

Then Elder Ballard says:

What are the precious, simple things of the gospel that bring clarity and purpose to our lives? What are the flecks of gospel gold whose patient accumulation over the course of our lifetime will reward us with the ultimate treasure—the precious gift of eternal life?

I think fairly often about the paradox of the mundane vs. the eternal in our lives. Sometimes I feel kind of resentful that the things of mortality take SO much time and attention. It seems if I had to spend less time just getting people from here to there, and figuring out how to make our money stretch to cover all our needs, and attending to food and clothing and every little immediate demand each new day brings— (and acknowledging, of course, that I have to worry about those things much less than most people have had to throughout history)—anyway, if I could spend less time on "mortal life" and more time in contemplation and service and things of the divine and eternal—it seems like I would progress so quickly! And I'd be such a good person!

But this story just reminded me again that it's not productive to always be waiting for the "gold nuggets" of unbroken study time and uncontentious family togetherness and beautifully complete gospel discussions. I should be content gathering the little flecks—a quick moment of insight during a hasty home church, two children giggling happily together at bedtime, a snatch of unaccountable happiness looking at the Fall leaves at a time my heart is heavy with worry. It is the accumulation of those things (and the deliberate gathering of those things) that will fill my life with joy.

Great things are wrought through simple and small things. Like the small flecks of gold that accumulate over time into a large treasure, our small and simple acts of kindness and service will accumulate into a life filled with love for Heavenly Father, devotion to the work of the Lord Jesus Christ, and a sense of peace and joy each time we reach out to one another.

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From sympathy to a decision to act

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Morning Session of the April 2011 Conference. 

Elder Eyring has a way of making things sound so simple and elegant. I love how he introduced the topic of his talk:

[The Lord] loves His children in need and also those who want to help. And He has created ways to bless both those who need help and those who will give it.

It's the whole purpose of life in two sentences! I love the efficiency of God's plan, which provides for every situation. When things are hard, He puts people and systems in place to help us. When things are good, He gives us responsibilities to help us learn humility and compassion. And of course those two situations cross over and combine throughout our lives. But I love that God's hand is always there with what we need.

I also liked this:

The Lord regularly sends wake-up calls to all of us. Sometimes it may be a sudden feeling of sympathy for someone in need. A father may have felt it when he saw a child fall and scrape a knee. A mother may have felt it when she heard the frightened cry of her child in the night. A son or a daughter may have felt sympathy for someone who seemed sad or afraid at school.

All of us have been touched with feelings of sympathy for others we don’t even know. For instance, as you heard reports of the waves rushing across the Pacific after the earthquake in Japan, you felt concern for those who might be hurt.

Feelings of sympathy came to thousands of you who learned of the flooding in Queensland, Australia. The news reports were mainly estimates of numbers of those in need. But many of you felt the pain of the people. The wake-up call was answered by 1,500 or more Church member volunteers in Australia who came to help and to comfort.

They turned their feelings of sympathy into a decision to act on their covenants. I have seen the blessings that come to the person in need who receives help and to the person who seizes the opportunity to give it.

I had never thought of all these feelings of sympathy he describes as being "wake-up calls" to help us remember to act on our covenants. But they are. They are invitations to act! I guess sometimes it can happen the other way too—an action of service can stir feelings of love and sympathy—but either way, it's nice to think that Heavenly Father gave us the innate ability to notice and empathize with others so that we could then learn to help each other. Of course, we can choose to ignore those feelings, but if we choose to listen to them, so many miracles can happen!

…You have seen that miracle of sympathy turned to unselfish action.…It is a manifestation of the Lord’s way to help those in great need become self-reliant. We feel compassion, and we know how to act in the Lord’s way to help.

Other posts in this series:

The atonement covers all pain—by Rozy 

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Daisy's birthday, camps, and so on

Daisy turned 16! Hooray! Junie and Goldie decorated their room for her: balloons, a banner, flowers, and party hats for the animals.

Notice the gnomes and bunnies Clementine contributed to the banner. And look at the lonnnnnnnng arm of that bunny holding the purple balloon. I love it.

Gus drew this cute penguin for Daisy

We went and got Daisy's driver's license (easy as pie; she had already passed the road test the week before) and celebrated with lunch after. The man at the DMV was really nice (bless him!) and almost fatherly, lecturing Daisy with just enough seriousness about what a big responsibility a license was, and reminding her of all the rules she was agreeing to. It was super cute because the man said, "Now remember, for the first six months, no driving with friends!" and Daisy said, "…Unless your friends are your sisters!"

She wasn't wrong. And lucky for her, her friends are her sisters, and the first thing she wanted to do when we got home was take them on a drive around the neighborhood—all by themselves! Do their faces reassure you that they will be calm, responsible, non-silly individuals during this outing? 

It was a happy day for Daisy and all of us!

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A few other things:

Gnomes and bunnies drawn by Clementine

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Every year we have a contest within our family where we each guess when the snow on Timpanogos will be completely melted. We make our guesses around Memorial Day and then keep a close eye on it all summer. Sometimes the snow melts early in August (possibly even July some years) and sometimes it never melts at all before the next snow falls! As the summer goes on, it gets harder and harder to see the tiny little spots, and sometimes there is a bit of disagreement over whether something is a patch of snow…or just a shiny rock. This picture was to prove that the snow was not quite gone yet!

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For Activity Days, Teddy got to visit a nearby construction site where a new church is being built. All the boys got to drive the backhoe and front-end loader and even make them scoop up some dirt! Can you imagine a better little-boy activity?

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Some pretty skies

Junie and Daisy and Amelia collapsing with laughter (their default state, honestly) over something or other.

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It's hard to believe this was Goldie's first year at girls' camp! She seems so much the same age as Daisy and Junie. She was so glad not to have to stay home without them like she did last year!

Sam went to camp too! We thought it would just be for a couple of the days, but no other dads volunteered, so he ended up staying the whole time. He and the bishop stayed in a tent outside and all the girls got to stay in this great house. They had horseback riding and even their own swimming pool! It was fun that Sam got to be there with all three of our girls.

The leaders said the girls could choose if they wanted to do the hike or not, and Daisy was the only girl that chose to go. Ha! She was happy enough, since she usually finds herself talking to mostly the leaders anyway.

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Sadly, we aren't going to be able to do the children's choir this year, but Daisy and Junie and Teddy and Ziggy got to go to the summer choir camp anyway. (Goldie was at Oakcrest camp, the camp our stake does for 7th graders.) It was Ziggy's first time doing anything like that, and he loved it! He had told me he was absolutely NOT going to like the singing, and we'd soothed him with promises of pizza and games and swimming, but when he got home what do you suppose he said he'd liked best? The singing!

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Clementine holding up the tag that came on her dress, which shows a little girl wearing the dress. "MATCH!"

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While all the other children were gone at camps, we had a funeral to go to and no one to tend the little ones! It's a rare day that happens anymore. We ended up just taking Gus and Clementine to the funeral with us, and they were so good!

Clementine drew gnomes. This one gets more disturbing the more you look at it.

And then we went to Costco.

We also went out to eat one of the nights, since we only had three kids at home! Practically empty nesters!

Reacting nervously to the onion-volcano

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Here's Goldie at Oakcrest

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If you meet or talk to Clementine these days, there is a 98% chance she will tell you, a.) that she used to be three but now she's four, and b.) that she knows how to "pump" on the swings. She is SO proud of herself, and rightly so—pumping is a great skill! Now she tells me, whenever she's running to a swingset, "Don't push me! I can pump myself!"

These two are so cute together. Here they are off on an adventure, with backpacks!

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I was helping in primary one day and couldn't resist taking a picture of Zig's enthusiasm after being picked to pull the string "noodles" through the picture's mouth. The primary children LOVE this activity. Their song leader has so many fun ideas.

I love Gus's picture of Jesus by the temple

Ward potluck at the hill—Ziggy and his friend Henry

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Not sure why I took this picture, but these were some super good hamburgers.

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Sushi with Junie for her book lunch

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Rice crispie volcano models for our Volcanoes unit study

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Puzzle for Family Home Evening

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Three-eared bunny?

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Watching a whole line of utility trucks

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The last few missionaries from this big group of Seb's peers have been coming home this summer! It was fun to see all these cross-country friends back together again at their homecoming sacrament meetings.

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