Confidence through self-mastery

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Afternoon Session of the October 1985 Conference.

You'll be pleased to know that President Monson, in this session, quoted the poem about "'I love you mother,' said little Nell"—oh, surely you know the one? My mom had all of us children memorize poems when we were little, and this is one of the ones we had to memorize, and then it seemed like President Monson was ALWAYS quoting it. The way I remember it, he quoted it at least once a year through my entire childhood. I knew immediately, when I started reading his talk this week, that it was going to make an appearance.

Anyway, I actually wanted to write about a different talk this week—President Nelson's talk on self-mastery. Specifically, I've been thinking about this part:

Another step toward self-mastery comes when you are old enough to observe the law of the fast. As funds are contributed from meals missed, the needs of the poor may be met. But meanwhile, through your spirit, you develop personal power over your body’s drives of hunger and thirst. Fasting gives you confidence to know that your spirit can master appetite.

I've wondered about that scripture from Doctrine and Covenants 121, "…let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God." I used to think that it was saying "If you are a good enough person, you won't be ashamed to stand before God at the last day." That seems like a pretty bold statement to make, considering that we are all sinners and I've always assumed we'll be keenly aware of our shortcomings once we meet God again. But President Nelson's quote made me think that maybe the "confidence" we'll feel by learning self-mastery—through fasting or virtue or any other method—isn't really a confidence of "I'm good enough to be here!" once we meet God—but more a confidence that comes here and now as we dare to approach God more frequently. I find that usually, when I am very discouraged with myself, I'M the one putting limits on our interactions. "Oh, he is probably so disappointed with me. I don't even feel like I can ask Him for more help!" Maybe thinking about times I HAVE obeyed even when it was hard would help me feel a little less timid and more confident in asking?

I always try to remind my kids of challenging things they've done and tell them "You can do hard things!" because I feel like it helps them be more willing to attempt other things that scare them. And that seems like the same message President Nelson is giving us here—"See, you CAN overcome the natural man! Look at how faithfully you fast every month! That's hard, but you do it!" Of course that only works as reassurance if we DO fast faithfully—which I know is hard for some of us, or we go years without doing it because of pregnancy/nursing—but it seems like we could extrapolate to other "self-mastery" situations too. And it's interesting to think that the blessing of our "confidence wax[ing] strong" might be more for our OWN sakes…so that we feel brave enough or worthy enough to seek God's presence, rather than shrinking away from Him.

Other posts in this series:

Ten Ways to Pray for the Atonement to Help Us—by Jan Tolman