Eyes that see more clearly

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Morning Session of the October 2013 Conference.

There were some amazing talks in this session. Elder Soares' talk on meekness was great. Elder Bednar's talk on tithing is a classic. Elder Uchtdorf's talk "Come, Join With Us" is so profound and still completely relevant (it's the "doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith" talk). But the quote I finally chose to write about was from Elder Bednar. He talks about the "significant but subtle" ways Heavenly Father often opens the windows of heaven to us—for example, rather than just giving us a new job, giving us "the blessing of greater personal determination to search harder and longer for a position than other people may be able or willing to do." Then he says:

Sometimes we may ask God for success, and He gives us physical and mental stamina. We might plead for prosperity, and we receive enlarged perspective and increased patience, or we petition for growth and are blessed with the gift of grace. He may bestow upon us conviction and confidence as we strive to achieve worthy goals. And when we plead for relief from physical, mental, and spiritual difficulties, He may increase our resolve and resilience.…

I wrote about a similar subject in this post a couple years ago, but I'm thinking about it again today. It's our wedding anniversary (25 years!) and so many things have shifted in my understanding of God's plan since that happy, blissfully ignorant day Sam and I walked out of the temple as husband and wife. I've received so many "blessings in disguise" (though plenty of the undisguised ones as well, of course!) and surprising learning experiences. So many perspective shifts which seem at first like just interesting ideas and then surprising truths and then established realities barely worth remarking on anymore. I have changed and I am changing. It's strange to think as much change or more is likely ahead.

Elder Bednar then says this:

I testify that as we are spiritually attentive and observant, we will be blessed with eyes that see more clearly, ears that hear more consistently, and hearts that understand more fully the significance and subtlety of His ways, His thoughts, and His blessings in our lives.

I don't know how you'd know or if it even matters, but I wonder what the difference is between seeing more of God's already-existing blessings and actually receiving more blessings that weren't there before? Is God's goodness and mercy "poured out" consistently over our lifetimes and it's only our own comprehension that changes? Because I've definitely become more aware of God's involvement in my life, and my definition of what constitutes Him blessing me has certainly expanded, but I'm also convinced that the amount of tender mercies themselves truly must have doubled and tripled and exponentiafied (??) since I first started trying to write them down. Even during the most seemingly boring and mundane stretches of time, when I think to myself, "Wow, everything feels so stagnant and dull right now, surely I haven't had the light of heaven in my life for weeks"—or during the hard times when everything actually seems bad—I will look back at the tiny moments of clarity and tender mercies jotted down and realize there wasn't a single day God didn't reach out to bless me in some little way. Has He always been doing that? It is hard to comprehend.

Either way, learning to see the "significance and subtlety" of God's ways is no small blessing. I am constantly praying for even more of that ability in my eyes and ears and heart, because there are still plenty of experiences I resent or dread or misunderstand. Still plenty of "blessings in disguise," I imagine, which I just don't yet comprehend with my "natural eyes." But even to be able to conceive that they someday might be blessings, to step outside of my current blindness far enough to even realize that I might be blind, to be able to even imagine a different understanding than my present one—this is a powerful gift. This remarkable article by V. H. Cassler about "Dark Miracles" (the author's term for "blessings in disguise") has been so impactful for me. She says:

One of the most important things I have learned in this life is that a lot of the fish God gives us look initially like serpents, and many of the loaves look like stones. We must have faith that those stones could one day be seen by us as bread.

I suppose that kind of faith will expand God's blessings more and more as we, like a four-year-old going through his rock collection and not being able to throw out a single one of them, examine and re-examine each of our mortal experiences and see the beauty they contained. I don't suppose paying tithing (which after all was the entire premise of Elder Bednar's talk) is the only law tied to the blessing of expanded understanding. Perhaps all of God's laws are tied to it. But I just know that I want to keep seeking it.

Blessed with truth

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Young Women's Session of the April 2013 Conference.

I have been thinking about this quote from Sister Mary N. Cook:

Your children will be blessed with truth as you weave your virtuous example and unshakable testimony into their lives and show them the way on the covenant path.

The parameters of this promise are interesting. It doesn't say anything about what our children will do with the truth or whether they will walk on the covenant path. When I was younger, that might have been discouraging to me—like what's the point of all that example and testimony if it's not going to get results? But I've been thinking about that simple statement "your children will be blessed with truth." It really is such an enormous blessing just to know truth! So many people don't know it, and know not where to find it. So many people have to start from scratch, falling into every kind of trouble and deception, before they manage to find what's true and lasting. And our children won't have that. They will still need to learn many things through their own experience, often hard experience, of course! But they will have this great gift of truth to come back to whenever they choose. From a young age, they will have been able to know and feel truth, to have it surrounding them in the very air they breathe. It has been that way with me. The knowledge that I'm a Child of God, that I have a Heavenly Father, has been in my heart and my bones since before I could talk. I could choose to disregard that truth, but I can't unknow it!

And this is a gift I can give my children and am giving them—no matter how many other flaws I have as a mother, or the things I don't do well or the mistakes I make—I will still weave my testimony of Heavenly Parents and Jesus Christ into their lives because that testimony is part of my life, and I will still introduce them to the reality of the covenant path back to God because it's my path. Whatever they choose to do with that truth—it will always be there for them. 

Other posts in this series:

Holy Places—by Rozy

Easter Week

I love Holy Week! We started it off a day early on "Lazarus Saturday" this year. I've wanted to try making these "Lazarekia" rolls for a while now. They're like little men wrapped in grave clothes. So cute. And look how well we made them; just like the picture😄

Hahaha! As my friend so accurately pointed out, it is not very often you find a recipe that can be used for both Halloween and Easter.

Living day-to-day as a disciple

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday Afternoon Session of the April 2013 Conference.

This week I have been thinking and praying about something that troubles me from time to time. It's not that I think my current stage of motherhood is unimportant; I know what I do for my family is important, and I believe in it. But sometimes I just feel so aware of how many trivial and mundane things take up my attention. I start to worry that I’m just being pulled along from deadline to deadline, from task to task, never really feeling free of the mild stress of those things that have to be done, and never really rising to any higher purpose or seeing any higher vision. I worry that "the world is too much with me" and I'm going to somehow miss what God really wants me to be doing.

So I was grateful to read several conference talks which seemed to speak to those thoughts. For example, from Elder Christofferson:

The greatest service we can provide to others in this life, beginning with those of our own family, is to bring them to Christ through faith and repentance so they may experience His Redemption...Much of our redemptive work on earth is to help others grow and achieve their just hopes and aspirations.

And this from Elder Bruce D. Porter:

Trials may come, and we may not understand everything that happens to us or around us. But if we humbly, quietly trust in the Lord, He will give us strength and guidance in every challenge we face. When our only desire is to please Him, we will be blessed with a deep inner peace.

And this from Elder Erich W. Kopischke:

Too often we think that the word sacrifice refers to something big or hard for us to do. In certain situations this may be true, but mostly it refers to living day-to-day as a true disciple of Christ.

And 

Other ways to observe our covenants by sacrifice are as simple as accepting a calling in the Church and faithfully serving in that calling or following the invitation of our prophet, Thomas S. Monson, to reach out to those who are standing at the wayside and need to be spiritually rescued. We observe our covenants by sacrifice by giving silent service in our neighborhood or community or by finding the names of our ancestors and doing temple work for them. We observe our covenants by sacrifice by simply striving for righteousness, being open, and listening to the promptings of the Spirit as we live our daily lives. Sometimes observing our covenants means nothing more than standing firmly and faithfully when the storms of life are raging all around us.

Crowns ex nihilo, blossoms, temple open house

Clementine keeps getting bigger whether we like it or not. Right now she's in a cutting and making phase. She makes the funniest, clumsiest, little creations because she has no idea what she's doing. The other idea she came out with little crowns for her and Milky (the bunny) to wear, and it was if she had conceived the idea of a crown ex nihilo. No thought of the usual long strip with points. Just a totally haphazard mixture of shapes she must have somehow envisioned in her head, taped together however she could manage it. And she was so proud. I almost started crying just looking at her proud little face. 

Synchronized Skating, International Gardens, Overnighter

Through a series of events I realize now are too boring to recount, we got some free tickets to the U.S. Synchronized Skating Championships at the Maverik Center. Did you know there was such a thing? We did not. I'd never even heard of the sport. But we do, of course, love to watch figure skating and thought it would be fun to see what synchronized skating was!

Jesus is the Way

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week we're taking a break from past conferences to talk about the General Conference that took place last weekend, 4-5 April 2026.

It's always nice to have an Easter Conference. It led to a lot of talks with Easter themes, but I haven't even really had time to think about other themes there might have been. I did lose track of the number of times someone quoted President Oaks saying "Jesus is the way," so maybe that was another common thread! At any rate, here are some miscellaneous thoughts (taken from my very poor notes) about some of the talks I liked.

I thought it was good how President Dallin H. Oaks emphasized one reason why Jesus Christ's resurrection is so important—because of the way it can transform our mortal experience. By changing our view of what happens after this life, it encourages us to seek and build lasting relationships, and helps us see other people as our brothers and sisters. I loved the story of the nurse who was granted the gift to see her rude, difficult patient as a child of God. I've prayed for that kind of Godly perspective, and have occasionally been granted it, but usually I'm just left to my own efforts struggling to see unpleasant people as God sees them. I suppose the very effort leads to learning! I also loved President Oaks' point that suspicion and distrust usually gives way when personal, loving contact is maintained. It gives such importance to our interactions with neighbors and acquaintances. Any person might dislike our church or religion in general; he may think our beliefs as a group are ridiculous—but if an actual person is kind to him, friendly to him, persistently polite and thoughtful—how can he help but feel the love of God? And we know the love of God can transform the hardest heart.

President Eyring's talk on prayer was one of my favorites. (Was it on prayer? Anyway, that's what my notes are about.) He said that even our "non-verbal prayers" have power—that our feelings and love could be so constant that it would "count" (?) as our "prayers ascending always" to God. I like that idea of even our hopes and silent thoughts being weighed for our good. I was also very struck by his description of how he felt at his wife's funeral: "The Holy Ghost allowed me to envision the happy reunion ahead as if it were already a reality." I'm not sure those were his exact words, but the meaning of that is astonishing to me! To  trust God so much that I already feel future blessings as if they've happened? To be as joyful in the hope as in the fulfillment of that hope? That's an astounding blessing, really. It shows the depth of President Eyring's faith, but he also said it was a gift from the Holy Ghost, which means I can pray for it too.

Of course I loved Elder Kearon's talk, as I'm coming to know I always will. I love how he described common consent, sustaining each other in our callings, as a principle that brings together agency, unity, and faith. He said our callings have a "foundational role" in the formation of our faith, which makes sense, but I don't always think about my callings like that! Every calling, he said, is a way to follow Jesus by "being about our father's business." And they give us a way to "pursue Christ" and His virtues.

I need to read Elder Bednar's talk again, but I liked the premise that "enduring to the end" doesn't mean what we usually assume it means. I'm not sure if I fully grasped his point, but I think it was something like this: enduring to the end is not just a command, but a promise that we're capable of reaching an "end" where we have changed to become like Jesus Christ. Knowing this, "enduring" becomes the "joyous quest of a lifetime" because it's the gradual process of learning to love and trust God, making our connection to Him stronger and deeper.

Elder Christofferson's talk seemed to be on a similar theme. He asked a question I've often wondered about: how did Jesus get to be who He is? How did He get his character? According to Elder Christofferson, Jesus's character is a result of what is in His heart—His desires, thoughts, and actions. So if we cultivate charity in our hearts, for example,  it can lead to a bunch of other Christlike traits. He quoted someone as saying that "our character is revealed in our power to discern the suffering of others when we ourselves are suffering." Very interesting. I also liked how he described one of the things in Christ's heart as the "passion to further the advancement of others." I don't think I could say I have a "passion" for this myself, but I'm going to pray for it! 

It was also interesting how Elder Christofferson linked our development of this Christlike character directly to the Second Coming of Christ. It always sounded like he was saying, "the faster we as a people gain these traits, the faster Jesus can come again." And he was telling us to hurry up and get working on it!

Elder Stevensen's talk was so good! He talked about the lost luggage and the airport which never loses luggage (so amazing!). I loved it when he described how God "labels" each of us with the intention: "You are mine. I intend to bring you home." It's so beautiful to think about how we could transform the world if we looked at every single person as God's precious possession, making sure each one was counted, tracked, and cared for. It reminds me of Elder William K Jackson's talk in the last conference about numbering and remembering the sheep. I feel that "we" as a church should be so much better at this —and I know that "we" has to keep starting with me (rather than just me getting frustrated that no one else is doing his job right, haha). When I feel discouraged about that, I have to remember that as Elder Christofferson said in his talk above, we really can make a difference in the world one by one. And people are helping to bring Heavenly Father's precious children back one by one, in wards and branches and families all over the world! The principle works when we each do our parts—it's already working! (We just need to do it…more.)

Now that I think of it, Sister Kristin Yee's talk was on the same theme—how ministering to one person is the most powerful thing we can do. I loved her statement that "we are sent here to love in sacrificial and transformational ways—even ways that seem impossible." And I'm still thinking about all she could have meant by "when we bless the one, we bless the whole."

I think I'm going to like Elder Renlund's talk about focusing on Jesus and His atonement. I was trying to make bread dough for our "empty tomb rolls" during his talk so I missed a lot. But I deeply related to his story about his dog being totally overwhelmed trying to keep track of two balls at once, so I have a feeling I truly need the counsel that followed!

Elder Gong talked about "Abide with Me" in a kind of lyrical or poetic way, as is his custom, and it means I always need to re-read to catch more of his meaning. I don't even know if he talked about this point particularly, but he brought up the three times Jesus wasn't recognized after His resurrection, and I thought it was interesting comparing those three instances. I've never thought about them side by side before. The first was with Mary at the tomb, the second was with two disciples, and the third was with eleven disciples. What I think is interesting is the three ways those people ended up recognizing the Savior: with Mary, it was when He said her name. With the two disciples, it was "in the breaking of bread." And with the eleven, it was when they saw His hands. This feels significant to me—like maybe these are categories of ways we could help others recognize God? or come to know Him better ourselves? I want to think about that a little more. (And that's the good thing about Elder Gong's poetic/symbolic style, I guess—it suggests meanings that aren't necessarily stated outright.)

It was also interesting that Elder Soares had nearly the same theme as Elder Gong—"Abide with me" and how we can "abide in Christ." He said inviting the Savior to abide with us is essential for our spiritual survival.

I liked when Sister Emily Belle Freeman said "When Peter had a tasked that seemed too big, Jesus was there within reaching distance."

I liked when Elder Jorge Becarra said the reason he had confidence to pay tithing in a difficult financial time was because of his mother's Family Home Evening lesson! (What?? Some children listen to FHE lessons??! This is news to me.)

I need to read Elder Thierry Mutombo's talk. I heard him talk about his ten children, and how four of them have died, which is so heartbreaking to think about. But I didn't hear what he said about that, and I'm sure it was good!

And lastly, I loved Elder Clement M. Matswagatata's talk, because he is our friend! He came to our Stake Conference and gave such good talks, and he actually met with Sam one-on-one for about seven minutes (part of interviewing the high council before calling a new Stake President)—so basically, we are best friends now.😄 I didn't talk to him but I did talk to his wife for a minute and I loved her! His conference talk wove together themes of Jesus calling us by name and walking with us (which I am realizing now really did appear all through Conference). I liked his reminder that "there is always someone praying for you." I don't think about that very often. I of course pray for others, and am trying to get continually better at remembering specific people and specific blessings they need, but who would be praying for me? It's nice to realize that my mom, my husband, my brothers, my friends, my ministering sisters, and others are probably praying for me just as I am for them! 

And that's it! Another good General Conference to digest and study for the next six months! I missed having a Saturday Evening Session 😢 but it looks like I have plenty to keep me busy with the four sessions we got, so I'm excited for the transcripts to come out so I can get to work!

Just some things

As I think I've said already, having an unseasonably warm February and March was so nice! We got to play outside during many of our Field Trip days, with minimal outerwear. There were even a couple days where we got to pick up Sam from BYU during his free hour between classes and have him come to a playground with us. So fun!

The very moment you begin

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday Morning Session of the April 2013 Conference.

I don't really have that much to say about it, but I just loved Elder Uchtdorf's talk, The Hope of God's Light. It feels so right for this time of year, for Holy Week and for the coming springtime. He says,

Lift up your soul in prayer and explain to your Heavenly Father what you are feeling. Acknowledge your shortcomings. Pour out your heart and express your gratitude. Let Him know of the trials you are facing. Plead with Him in Christ’s name for strength and support. Ask that your ears may be opened, that you may hear His voice. Ask that your eyes may be opened, that you may see His light.

There was a time recently when I prayed to ask Heavenly Father why we often have to fight so hard to see things in an optimistic way. It feels like you have to deliberately wrench a hopeful meaning out of unhopeful events at times, and I was wishing it were easier. Then I felt the Spirit telling me, "The hopeful view is always there. But seeing it is a blessing given in return for the effort made to turn and look at it."

Something about this quote from Elder Uchtdorf's talk reminded me of that. It is so hopeful for ourselves and for our loved ones:

The very moment you begin to seek your Heavenly Father, in that moment, the hope of His light will begin to awaken, enliven, and ennoble your soul.

San Francisco for a day!

I'm sure I've told you that Seb's job with United comes with flight benefits. He can fly on any United flight on standby, any time he can get a seat. In practice it's kind of complicated, and it's definitely not a no-hassle ticket to anywhere you want on demand, but you can, apparently, figure out the system and get some great benefits from it! Seb really loves it and uses practically all of his days off to fly to interesting airports, fly on certain planes he likes, or even just come home and spend a day with us. He can even fly first class if there are seats available.

What I don't know if I've also said is that we (his parents) get those benefits too! Because of the logistics of flying on standby, we haven't and probably won't be able to use them as often as Seb! It's not the best system for if you need to be in a certain place at a certain time, and that is only way a working man like Sam CAN travel! But it's kind of fun and cool all the same. This year, Seb also listed Goldie as his one "friend" who can get the benefits too. So, a few weeks ago, Seb called me saying, "Flights are really open in the next few days. There are 50-60 seats available on a ton of different flights. Do you want to go somewhere?"

One step at a time

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Priesthood Session of the April 2013 Conference.

There were lots of missionary stories in this Conference (here and here, for example) but what stuck with me from this week was this quote by Elder Uchtdorf. It's not like this is an unusual metaphor (I feel like everyone always compares everything to babies learning to walk) but it's just such a good reminder of how God sees our faltering efforts—not with anger or impatience or annoyance, but cheering us on with love:

We have all seen a toddler learn to walk. He takes a small step and totters. He falls. Do we scold such an attempt? Of course not. What father would punish a toddler for stumbling? We encourage, we applaud, and we praise because with every small step, the child is becoming more like his parents.

Now, brethren, compared to the perfection of God, we mortals are scarcely more than awkward, faltering toddlers. But our loving Heavenly Father wants us to become more like Him, and, dear brethren, that should be our eternal goal too. God understands that we get there not in an instant but by taking one step at a time.

I do not believe in a God who would set up rules and commandments only to wait for us to fail so He could punish us. I believe in a Heavenly Father who is loving and caring and who rejoices in our every effort to stand tall and walk toward Him. Even when we stumble, He urges us not to be discouraged—never to give up or flee our allotted field of service—but to take courage, find our faith, and keep trying.

So you can cease to fear

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Afternoon Session of the April 2013 Conference.

This conference had two beautiful talks about peace. Elder Quentin L. Cook takes pains to point out that "universal peace" or world peace is not the same as the personal peace we have access to at all times through being righteous. "This [personal] peace," he says, "is a promised gift of the Savior's mission and atoning sacrifice" and it is "not just a temporary tranquility. It is an abiding deep happiness and spiritual contentment."

Elder Cook talks about how even with the "peace taken from the earth" (a prophesied condition of the last days which prophets have said is already upon us) and the world in commotion, we can still feel the Savior's peace. When he gave this talk in 2013, he referenced the September 11th attacks of 2001. When the attacks happened, I do remember feeling, probably for the first time in my life, fear and uncertainty from an outside event. Sam and I were newly married, soon to be parents, and I was realizing for the first time that "the world" could actually reach into my home, my family, and hurt us! But by 2013 those feelings had mostly faded as I was immersed in motherhood and homeschool and our soon-to-be six children (I was expecting Marigold at the time of this conference). So I may not have really needed this talk when Elder Cook gave it. But now…I don't know if it's because the state of the world really is more scary and confusing and wicked, or if it's because my children are growing up and leaving my home and it feels, again, like the world is more able to get in and affect our lives, but the need for personal peace feels so relevant, even urgent! It feels like something I can't live without.

Elder Cook quotes President Heber J. Grant talking about the Savior's peace: 

"His peace will ease our suffering, bind up our broken hearts, blot out our hates, engender in our breasts a love of fellow men that will suffuse our souls with calm and happiness." 

Doesn't that sound like exactly what we need right now? He also quotes words I love from Eliza R. Snow's hymn "Though Deepening Trials": 

Lift up your hearts in praise to God;

Let your rejoicings never cease.

Though tribulations rage abroad,

Christ says, “In me ye shall have peace.” 

Elder Richard G. Scott's talk also focuses on personal peace, specifically on how we can make our homes places of peace. I liked this quote so much that I used it as the foundation for our school-year theme, "A place of refuge,"  a couple years ago:

Many voices from the world in which we live tell us we should live at a frantic pace. There is always more to do and more to accomplish. Yet deep inside each of us is a need to have a place of refuge where peace and serenity prevail, a place where we can reset, regroup, and reenergize to prepare for future pressures.

The ideal place for that peace is within the walls of our own homes, where we have done all we can to make the Lord Jesus Christ the centerpiece.

It's comforting to think that even when we start to feel that "the world is reaching in" panic, even when out-of-family (or in-family!) events make us feel helpless and vulnerable, we do have a way to keep our homes peaceful:

When we obey the commandments of the Lord and serve His children unselfishly, the natural consequence is power from God—power to do more than we can do by ourselves. Our insights, our talents, our abilities are expanded because we receive strength and power from the Lord. His power is a fundamental component to establishing a home filled with peace.

And then this is my favorite quote of the whole conference:

When you feel that there is only a thin thread of hope, it is really not a thread but a massive connecting link, like a life preserver to strengthen and lift you. It will provide comfort so you can cease to fear.

I'm so grateful for the hope and peace the Savior and His gospel allow us. I'm grateful for the "connecting link" of my covenants with Him. I want and need His gift of peace in my life!

Valentine's Day

 

Valentine's Day has always (as long as I can remember, anyway) been a family holiday more than a romantic holiday for us. I love making valentines for all the kids every year and seeing the ones they make for each other. We set them out at each other's places at the breakfast table, and everyone is SO excited to run into the kitchen in the morning and see what is there!

You will have the comfort of His love

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Morning Session of the April 2013 Conference.

This conference had so many words of encouragement that felt directed specifically toward mothers about their families. Here is a sampling. 

• God will give us power to nurture our families! 

The same priesthood power that created worlds, galaxies, and the universe can and should be part of our lives to succor, strengthen, and bless our families, our friends, and our neighbors—in other words, to do the things that the Savior would do if He were ministering among us today. (Elder Ballard)

• Following our covenants—just living those ordinary acts of obedience—will give great protection to our homes. 

Latter-day Saints recognize the transcendent importance of the family and strive to live in such a way that the adversary cannot steal into our homes. We find safety and security for ourselves and our children in honoring the covenants we have made and living up to the ordinary acts of obedience required of the followers of Christ. (Elder Packer)

• Motherhood is a great work, and Heavenly Father loves us for doing it!

Our daily contributions of nurturing, teaching, and caring for others may seem mundane, diminished, difficult, and demeaning at times, and yet as we remember that first line in the Young Women theme—“We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us”—it will make all the difference in our relationships and our responses. (Sister Elaine S. Dalton)

• Serving those around us and keeping our own covenants is the best way to reach family members we are worried about. As we serve all of His children, God does miracles in the lives of our children.

Many of you have loved ones who are wandering off the path to eternal life. You wonder what more you can do to bring them back. You can depend on the Lord to draw closer to them as you serve Him in faith.…Your prayers and the prayers of those who exercise their faith will bring the Lord’s servants to help your family members. They will help them choose the way home to God, even as they are attacked by Satan and his followers, whose purpose it is to destroy families in this life and in eternity.…

My promise to you who pray and serve the Lord cannot be that you will have every blessing you may wish for yourself and your family. But I can promise you that the Savior will draw close to you and bless you and your family with what is best. You will have the comfort of His love and feel the answer of His drawing closer as you reach out your arms in giving service to others. …His arms are outstretched with yours to succor and bless the children of our Heavenly Father, including those in your family. (Elder Henry B. Eyring)

Teddy is 11…and miscellaneous other things

This is just a picture of Teddy looking mildly aware that I'm taking his picture. But there's something so Teddyish about it! I'm not even sure what. His tousled hair? His perceptive gaze? He looks old, too—as old as Abe looked when I started thinking, "Whoa, this boy is actually going to become a man at some point!" He is tall and strong for his age, and honestly seems like he ought to have been in Young Men's this year—but I'm glad we get him in primary for another year.

Never alone

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Relief Society Session of the October 2012 Conference.

I was really touched by the story Sister Linda S. Reeves told in her talk about a tour guide she met in Australia:

We found out that Mollie, a lovely woman in her 70s, has no children and has never married. She is an only child, and her parents have been deceased for many years. Her closest relatives are two cousins who live on another continent. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with the Spirit testifying to me, almost as if Heavenly Father were speaking: “Mollie is not alone! Mollie is my daughter! I am her Father! She is a very important daughter in my family, and she is never alone!”

I think it's so tender how the Lord remembered and loved his daughter Mollie so much that he even wanted to testify of it to a stranger. He wanted to remind Sister Reeves of the importance of every daughter in His family, and by doing so He also reminded her of her own worth. Sister Reeve goes on to say,

When we wonder if we are known by our Savior and our Father in Heaven or how well They know us personally, we might remember the Savior’s words to Oliver Cowdery:

“If you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things.”

Earlier the Savior stated to him, “There is none else save God that knowest thy thoughts and the intents of thy heart.”

The Savior reminded Oliver that He knew every detail of that pleading prayer—and remembered the exact time, the very night.

For some reason I'd never seen this scripture as a reminder of God's personal and tender knowledge of us. I always read it more as a gentle rebuke; telling Oliver "you should have remembered what I already told you!" But read this way, it's more like God saying, "Remember that special time You and I spent together? I will never forget it. I remember the details exactly. That's because it was important to Me." What an amazing reassurance of God's care!

And then I love the way Sister Reeves ended her talk:

Just as the Lord has testified to me that He has not forgotten His precious daughter Mollie Lenthal, I testify that He has not forgotten you! Whatever sin or weakness or pain or struggle or trial you are going through, He knows and understands those very moments. He loves you! And He will carry you through those moments, just as He did Mary and Martha. He has paid the price that He might know how to succor you. Cast your burdens upon Him. Tell your Heavenly Father how you feel. Tell Him about your pain and afflictions and then give them to Him. Search the scriptures daily. There you will also find great solace and help.

She speaks with the authority of one who knows God and has done these very things (and we learn from other parts of her talk that indeed she has, through some times of hard trial!). I love the image of this loving Father looking for and remembering each of His daughters, wanting to be close to each of us, caring about what is important to each of us, delighted as He watches each of us progress, and reassuring each of us that we are never alone.

Other posts in this series:

Faith in the atonement through our mortal adversities—by Rozy

Some exciting things

Great changes have been in the wind for Malachi (and thus, all of us!). He started college at BYU at the beginning of January. He and Abe are now both living at my mom's house in Provo, though Malachi still has a debate class up by us, so he is often home for a day or two on the weekend and sometimes comes to church with us. Abe is very persuasive, though, and likes Malachi to come to church with him (also Abe is the ward clerk so he just snatched Malachi's records from us without permission!😡), so it depends on the week. Either way, we miss Ky a lot! It seemed like he was hardly ever home before anyway, but it actually does feel quite different to have him gone-gone. Sitting at the dinner table feels strange without him. Sitting on the church pew feels strange without him. Having family home evening seems strange without him. Our family just doesn't feel quite the same, and I don't like it! Happy for him, of course—college is just the sort of place Malachi loves and thrives in—but sad that we feel smaller and less complete without our three big boys. They have set the tone at home for so long. We feel their loss!

My mom sneakily took this picture for me on Abe's and Ky's first day of school. Cute to see them heading off together like that!

My birthday

My birthday was such a nice day! Nice as in people were nice to me, and nice as in the weather was beautiful. I always wish to have a picnic on my birthday, and you might actually be surprised how often that wish comes true. Not every year, obviously. The year I was actually born there was a big snowstorm and my mom was afraid she wouldn't get to the hospital in time! But not not every year, either.

Store Day

 

We're having an Economics and Financial Literacy Unit for school right now, which means it was time to break out our family currency (Bunny Money). It's been years since we've done Bunny Money, so the little kids have been loving it. Zig earned enough for "Get a Treat with Mommy and Daddy" and this is the treat he chose! It was fun to talk with him and see how happy and proud of himself he was.

January happenings

Oh, January. It isn't the worst month…or is it? Actually I think it might be. February is also a candidate, but must be excluded due to my birthday (plus Teddy's and Sam's!) and its shorter length. So January it is—but this January was actually quite nice! The nice weather and sunshine definitely makes a difference, even interspersed with some grey days and smoggy skies.

Anyway, all the months go so fast these days, none of them really drag on like they used to seem to! Sebastian came home a couple times for visits, and the kids are always happy when he's around. He took them to the airport to watch planes.