The correlation between large and small

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Welfare Session of the October 1980 Conference.

One of the things that's been interesting in reading these old General Conference talks is thinking about how this is the counsel my parents were hearing when they were raising their family—raising me. I have realized how many things were part of our family culture because they were being encouraged by the prophets. I knew my parents were faithful in the church. But I don't think I realized just how many things they were doing as specific responses to specific directions from church leaders: things like having a garden, the canning and sewing and mending my mom did, the way they took care of our yard, the way they helped us keep journals. Now looking back, I'm amazed and inspired by how seriously they took the prophets' counsel, and how conscientiously they made it part of our lives.

One thing that I liked from Sister Barbara Smith's talk, "Follow Joyously," was the following sentence:

Let us make our kitchens creative centers from which emanate some of the most delightful of all home experiences.

I love that and endorse it wholeheartedly! I've heard people express dismay at how food-centered our church celebrations tend to be. I understand that it can be difficult for those with allergies or other food issues. But in my own life, "some of the most delightful of all home experiences," both in my family of birth and my family now, have been centered around cooking and eating together. I feel blessed that this has been the case. And I love that Sister Smith called the kitchen a "creative center" for producing such experiences! It makes the routine task of cooking and making meals (so many meals! Never-ending meals!) seem almost…impressive!

Sister Smith also said:

[A good homemaker] understands—as we each should—that life is made up of small daily acts. Savings in food budgets come by pennies, not only by dollars. Clothing budgets are cut by mending—stitch by stitch, seam by seam. Houses are kept in good repair nail by nail. Provident homes come not by decree or by broad brushstroke. Provident homes come from small acts performed well day after day. When we see in our minds the great vision, then we discipline ourselves by steady, small steps that make it happen. It is important to realize this correlation between the large and the small.

I read an article once talking about how thinking that something was just "a drop in the bucket" was a useless way of looking at things. "Sure, it is just a drop," the article said, "but it is IN THE BUCKET! It was out, and now it is in, and that means something!" That idea stuck with me and it's helped me try to do small things to improve life (like carrying an item one step closer to where it goes, even if I don't put it all the way away yet; or tidying a small corner of the room even if the whole thing is still mostly messy) with a little less existential despair. With so many kids, I feel like it's very important and necessary for me to have this perspective! It's so easy to feel that nothing will EVER be truly clean, the meals will never end, and the noise level will never drop below "too loud to hear oneself think." It's so easy to think, "What's the point in doing something that will almost immediately be UNdone?"

But Sister Smith's point is so good. There IS a correlation between large and small. In fact, when it comes to our daily acts, small is really THE SAME as large, just…in a different time frame. That is, the sum of those small things BECOMES the big thing over time. A small effort to make things a little bit tidier, a little bit more peaceful, a little more "delightful" in the kitchen—will contribute to a happy and satisfying home life for me and for my family. I can now see, as I talked about at the top of this post, how BIG the benefits were from all my parents' small efforts to do exactly what the prophets said they should do. They were small things and probably didn't feel impressive to my parents. As a child I didn't even notice them, but just figured that was normal and "how things were." But those small efforts have now spanned generations and are still blessing me in my life now!

Another thing that fits into this theme was from Elder Douglas W. DeHaan's talk, “Is Any Thing Too Hard for the Lord?” He tells a really cool story about bringing the crops in from their welfare farm (you'll have to go and read it!) and then he shares this insight:

Most of the blessings of the Lord seem to come in the second mile. The first mile is doing what is expected of us. As we move beyond the first mile in faith and determination, we may draw down the powers of heaven, but this only so far as we are in spiritual condition to do so.

I guess this is really this same statement from a previous conference, in different words. But it struck me a little differently—like maybe this version emphasizes our own agency a little more. It's not just that God blesses us when we endure more than we think we can. We can also CHOOSE those blessings by going farther or persevering longer than we really want to. I've had lots of experiences (like I wrote about in that link above) with being forced to go beyond what I thought were my limits. But I like the idea of deliberately saying to myself, "Well, this feels extra hard. So I'm going to have an even better attitude about it so that I can 'draw down the powers of heaven' to help me." Or, "I wish I had gotten an answer to my prayers by now. But I'm going to keep asking and trusting even longer so I can qualify for the 'second-mile' blessings."

And really, that principle shows the correlation between large and small too. The ways we get to "the second mile" are so small. They're mostly things like "hold on a little longer" or "just keep being patient" or "be willing to do a little more than was required." The second mile isn't a whole new journey! It's just...going on with the same thing a bit further, without giving up. And each small step on that path takes us closer to becoming like God!

Other posts in this series:

• Tithing: A Blessing From the Lord by Jan Tolman