Open our hearts

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Afternoon Session of the April 2008 Conference. 

My reading of Elder Gerald N. Lund's talk came at an interesting time for me, as I had just been discussing the idea of "walls around a heart" with someone, and his talk is called "Opening our hearts." My discussion had been in the context of marriage and how hard it sometimes feels to let down our defensive walls after being hurt by a spouse. But Elder Lund applies the same concept to the effort of letting the Spirit of God inside our hearts. As I think of times in life when my faith has felt weak or my ability to feel God's love has been compromised, the two feelings (defensiveness toward God or toward spouse) really are remarkably similar. You wouldn't think anyone would need to be self-protective and defensive toward a perfect God! But we are! I have been! It surely is not God's fault that I don't feel His love. But in that blinded state, it feels like His fault sometimes. Elder Lund says:

The heart is a tender place. It is sensitive to many influences, both positive and negative. It can be hurt by others. It can be deadened by sin. It can be softened by love. Early in our lives, we learn to guard our hearts. It is like we erect a fence around our hearts with a gate in it. No one can enter that gate unless we allow him or her to.

In some cases the fence we erect around our hearts could be likened to a small picket fence with a Welcome sign on the gate. Other hearts have been so hurt or so deadened by sin that they have an eight-foot chain-link fence topped with razor wire around them. The gate is padlocked and has a large No Trespassing sign on it.

…Individual agency is so sacred that Heavenly Father will never force the human heart, even with all His infinite power. Man may try to do so, but God does not. To put it another way, God allows us to be the guardians, or the gatekeepers, of our own hearts. We must, of our own free will, open our hearts to the Spirit, for He will not force Himself upon us.

So how do we open our hearts?

How do we open our hearts? That's the great question. When my heart feels hard, it feels impossible to even want it to soften…let alone to make it soften. And Elder Lund gives some ideas (you can read the talk yourself to find them, hee hee), but the thing that struck me most overall was the thought that God really can't (won't) guide us until we trust Him! Not because he withholds the Spirit or revelation, but because our lack of trust blocks it! I can think of specific times in my life when I've prayed for something, while at the same time thinking hopelessly, "He won't answer, He won't answer." And I can see how that really blocks my own ability to feel and receive. I'm giving up before I've even begun! 

After reading this talk, I think that even if I'm not sure how God can help me…or if I feel so beyond help or unworthy of it…the very act of asking and continuing to ask is an act of trust that can open my heart and let me receive the very thing I'm looking for. Continuing to ask means I think God will answer. Continuing to ask means I think He's aware of me. Hanging on to those truths (and obviously they are truths) can get me through a "dry spell" where I really don't feel much connection with God at all. And gradually, my heart can and will "open" again, and I will feel the love and guidance I so needed.

I say again, the condition of our hearts directly affects our sensitivity to spiritual things. Let us make it a part of our everyday striving to open our hearts to the Spirit. Since we are the guardians of our hearts, we can choose to do so. We choose what we let in or hold out. Fortunately the Lord is anxious to help us choose wisely.