Nutcrackering

 

The girls had so many parts in the Nutcracker this year! Fun to watch (and to participate in, I assume) but a bit of a nightmare as far as November and December rehearsals were concerned! I'm always a little mad about it as I'm driving them back and forth, but when it's finally time for the performances I forget that and just love watching them.

There's always a need for more boys in the cast, so this year they recruited Teddy to be a party boy. He worked hard to learn the dance and he looked so cute in his costume! It was fun for him to be part of something he's always just watched the girls do.

Here are their parts this year:

Teddy was a Party Boy.

Goldie was a Party Girl and a Snow Sprite.

Junie was a Party Girl, Party Boy (in the other cast), Snow Sprite, Jester, Arabian, and Flower.

Daisy was a Party Girl, Party Boy (in the other cast), Snow Corps, Chinese, and Flower.

Because of all their costume changes it was a little stressful the day of the performance! Junie wasn't quick enough into her costume for Arabian during the first performance, and didn't make it out on stage until halfway through the dance. She felt terrible and was crying afterwards, and then on top of that their teacher came and got mad at her and gave her a lecture about "goofing off" (which poor Junie tearfully assured me she hadn't been, but just couldn't get her pants on!). So that was sad. But then in the second performance about five other girls voluntarily rallied round to help her make that costume change, which I thought was very sweet, and all went well.

I think Goldie has the sweetest face looking at her doll!

Cute Teddy concentrating hard

Junie doing her jester gymnastics (the jester part was a solo, just her dancing for three minutes while everyone watched!)

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Good things to come

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Afternoon Session of the October 1999 Conference.

This session contains one of my favorite talks—maybe my favorite talk—of all time, Elder Holland's "An High Priest of Good Things to Come." I've read it so many times. Some parts of it are always in my head. I put off reading it when I got to it this time, thinking "I've read it too many times and it's probably lost its power." But when I finally got through it to that last story ("Don't give up, boy. Don't you quit.") I found myself crying again. The power is still there, and I guess it's because those principles of hope and a brighter future are really true! And the spirit testifies of them every time I read them.

I've been thinking about the different reasons this talk has been meaningful to me over the years. My challenges and my fears have changed, certainly since I first heard the talk at age 19, but even in the past few years. I have a 20-year-old of my own now. I thought of him, in fact, as I read this talk. Watching Abe navigate the ups and downs of his mission has been so interesting because he seems to be so positive about everything! When I talk to him on the phone I will say, "…but really. Wasn't it discouraging when this happened?" or "But are you REALLY just happy being out in the rain all day?" I can't tell if he's consciously always trying to look on the bright side or if he's just made that way! If someone is rude, he thinks it makes a funny story; if there's a downpour, he thinks it's cool to get caught in it; if it's cold, he thinks the warm car feels even nicer when he gets back in. Sometimes I worry that someday he will run into something so hard, so devastating that he can't just shake it off. But why do I worry about that? If and when that time comes, he will probably be the more prepared to face it with optimism because of his practice choosing hope now.

I think that's what Elder Holland means by saying

Such counsel [to be of good cheer] is not a jaunty pep talk about the power of positive thinking, though positive thinking is much needed in the world. No, Christ knows better than all others that the trials of life can be very deep and we are not shallow people if we struggle with them. But even as the Lord avoids sugary rhetoric, He rebukes faithlessness and He deplores pessimism. He expects us to believe!

I'm not who I was at age 20, but Elder Holland's advice is as good for me now as it was then. Whether hope comes instinctively (it does sometimes) or whether I have to claw my way toward it against all my instincts (I do sometimes)—I know the Savior would have me keep my eyes fixed on good things to come, which means keeping my eyes fixed on Him. I can't think of a single challenge in my life that is not improved when I do so. As Elder Holland so beautifully puts it,

Cling to your faith. Hold on to your hope. “Pray always, and be believing.”…Even if you cannot always see that silver lining on your clouds, God can, for He is the very source of the light you seek. He does love you, and He knows your fears. He hears your prayers. He is your Heavenly Father, and surely He matches with His own the tears His children shed.

There is help and happiness ahead—a lot of it—…it will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come.

Other posts in this series:

Repentance and Hope—by Rozy

This is the Gospel—by Nathaniel Givens

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Amidst a blur of ballet rehearsals

Oh all right. Early December wasn't ALL ballet rehearsals. But it did feel like I was constantly driving the girls back and forth and heating up late dinners and so forth. Whew, I'm so glad the Nutcracker is over! Lovely as it was, of course. Here are the girls in their cute little ballet hoodies (with their names on the sleeves! So fun).

Sebastian chose homemade donuts for his special November breakfast (which was in December. And for dinner. Details, details) which is a tradition we started accidentally years ago. (It was only meant to be for that year. But now it Must Be Done and it stretches out over what feels like weeeeks.) Everyone gets to choose a favorite breakfast and we talk about all the things we're thankful for about that person. It is fun! And these donuts were good! We get better at making them every year.

We found time one Saturday to put up our Christmas decorations! I can't decide if it's easier or harder with so many of the kids "helping." They CAN be legitimately helpful, but I think I'll go crazy if I hear another fight starting with "…but Daddy said I could put up the ____…" We also break an average of 4 ornaments a year. If we started with 100 ornaments, and allowing for 1-2 extra breaks every 3 years, how many years will it take for them to be completely gone? Just a little math problem for you to keep your skills fresh.

Anyway, I love decorating and I love the house at Christmas time. I love going to bed and waking up to the glow of the tree in the dark.

I don't even know why we have this Santa bag. To put people in, apparently.

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Lucia-light

In the past, we've had no problem moving our celebration of Santa Lucia Day to different days to make it more convenient. But this year…there WAS no convenient time. The older boys just have to leave too early! So there was nothing for it but to get up before them. However, I did have the brilliant idea of making the dough the night before and letting it do its first rise overnight in the cold garage, so that it didn't need to be quite so early!

Still, the girls and I were up at 5 to shape the buns and make the hot chocolate. It was surprisingly fun to be up so early together, whispering and bumping into things and rolling out the dough by tree-light and candle-light. I love these little but not-really-quite-so-little daughters of mine. We have so much fun together! Back when I was a little girl myself, looking through the American Girl doll catalog and admiring Kirsten's Santa Lucia outfit (my friend had the actual doll, and she was so cute), I could never have imagined I'd someday have so many little Lucias of my very own!

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At work on our roots

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday Morning Session of the October 1999 Conference.

Elder Neil L. Andersen spoke in this session. I wonder if it was his first Conference talk? He was a Seventy. He talked about when he lived in Florida and his lawn got eaten by mole crickets. They sound terrifying! Elder Andersen's neighbor saw one cricket scuttle across the sidewalk and warned him to spray for them, but he didn't see any signs of infestation, so he didn't. Then about ten days later, brown spots appeared in his lawn. Soon after it all died and had to be completely replaced.

Elder Andersen compares the mole crickets to the forces of Satan in our lives. They feed on the roots of our testimonies before we can see them, and if we don't take action, they can destroy us. He says:

Let me demonstrate the warning voice of the Prophets. On February 11 of this year, the First Presidency, with the support of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, sent to every member of the Church a letter of counsel concerning our families. Let me read you just two sentences from this letter:

“We counsel parents and children to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.”

What is our reaction to this prophetic counsel? What has been my response and your response to this First Presidency letter of nearly eight months ago?

As a parent of teenagers in a busy world, I can confirm that it takes giving these issues our highest priority to see them effectively work in our family. …With the influences of evil that surround our children, can we even imagine sending them out in the morning without kneeling and humbly asking together for the Lord’s protection? Or closing the day without kneeling together and acknowledging our accountability before Him and our thankfulness for His blessings? Brothers and sisters, we need to have family prayer.

Certainly there are times when getting the family together to read the scriptures does not stack up as a spiritual experience worthy of a journal entry. But we must not be deterred. There are special times when the spirit of a son or daughter is just right and the power of these great scriptures goes down into their heart like fire. As we honor our Heavenly Father in our homes, He will honor our efforts.

We all know the struggle necessary to retain family home evening. There are thieves among us who would steal our Monday nights. But the promises of the Lord made to families who hold family home evening, that were spoken by the First Presidency 84 years ago and reiterated by our Prophets today, have never been revoked and are there for us:

“If the Saints obey this counsel, we promise that great blessings will result. Love at home and obedience to parents will increase. Faith will be developed in the hearts of the youth of Israel, and they will gain power to combat the evil influence and temptations which beset them.”

Who within the sound of my voice would be willing to sell these promises to those who would confiscate our Monday nights? Not one of us.

For you and me, the disciples of Christ, these moments of building faith in the lives of our children must be strengthened. We will at times fall short as parents. I know I do. But we must begin again. The Lord sees our righteous efforts and will open the blessings of heaven as we give our families our highest priority. My brothers and sisters, there are spiritual mole crickets at work on our roots, and we must be even more serious in our family stewardship.

The world is wicked enough now that I'm not in danger of thinking these basic practices aren't needed in my family. However, it's very easy to feel like all these safety measures won't be enough; that even if we do manage to have prayer and scripture study and family home evening, our efforts as parents are hopeless anyway. When even lifelong members suddenly seem to be leaving the faith all around us, what chance is there for any of our children? How can we possibly withstand this day of Satan's power?

It is both hopeful and sobering to know that we fight him the same way we always have—by following prophetic counsel and hanging onto our covenants. President Nelson has given invitation after invitation, warning after warning. Through him and others, God has given us so many ways and so much counsel to invite the influence of the Savior into our homes. Am I taking it seriously enough?

Other posts in this series:

Families—by Rozy

Earrings, Scrupulosity, and Love—by Nathaniel Givens

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The important thing is the growth

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Conversion and Retention Broadcast in the April 1999 Conference.

This broadcast was out of the ordinary. You'd think I'd remember something about it, but I don't! I think maybe it was just for people in leadership positions. And it wasn't in April, it was in February 1999, but it's on the same page online as the talks from April 1999 Conference so I went ahead and read it.

President Hinckley starts by saying,

Speculation has been going about that President Hinckley is going to announce some new and glamorous program. I assure you that this is not so.

That made me laugh. Sounds like what everyone (me included) did for the first few Conferences after President Nelson became the prophet! We knew we shouldn't speculate. But we just couldn't help it!

Anyway, then he says:

I forewarn you, this will be a rather long talk. I am an old man. I do not know how much longer I will live, and so I want to say what I have to say, while I have the strength to say it. I do not know when I will give a talk this long again. I shall give two speeches interrupted by the singing of a hymn. Altogether, I will take about 40 minutes. Having been warned, some of you will wish to get comfortable. Pleasant dreams.

Haha! He was in fine form that day. I love him. And then he proceeded to give such an amazing talk on missionary work. I can't even quote all the parts I liked! I think it's so interesting how my perspective on missionary work has just…broadened, I guess, since Abe went on his mission. It's nothing I can pinpoint, because of course I've heard these things my whole life! President Hinckley talked so often about the needs of a convert (a friend, a responsibility, nourished by the good word of God) that I've incorporated that into my permanent worldview—I feel like I've always known those things. Likewise the idea of "every member a missionary" and the responsibility all of us have to fellowship and reach out to new members of our wards. 

But hearing from Abe week after week, talking with him about his efforts with the church members and the ward council and the people he's teaching—it's just made me feel all this in a different, more personal, way. And being on the ward council makes me aware of needs and responsibilities in a different way as well. My mind makes connections with these concepts based on my feelings and experiences, and I can't even describe in words what I feel. But I do encourage you to read the whole talk and hopefully it will fill you with hope and desire in the way it did me!

I will pull out one quote that struck me particularly, and the reason it did is that it applies so perfectly to youth (and even children!) too. I have always had a hard time giving people jobs I know they won't do well. When I was Young Women President years ago, I always felt ambivalent about the idea of the girls teaching the lessons. "They so desperately need GOOD lessons while they're still young and learning," I thought, "and it's the leaders who can provide those." And…I do still feel that in many ways. I do think there needs to be a good amount of direction, guidance, mentoring, etc. given by those who have more experience. But I have also realized over the years that there is good reason for the Lord's emphasis on giving a person his own assignment, her own responsibilities. And I've realized that even children and youth can do a lot of great things if you give them a chance.

So, here is the quote:

Activity is the genius of this Church. It is the process by which we grow. Faith and love for the Lord are like the muscle of my arm. If I use them, they grow stronger. If I put them in a sling, they become weaker. Every convert deserves a responsibility. The bishop may feel that he is not qualified for responsibility. Take a chance on him. Think of the risk the Lord took when He called you.

Of course the new convert will not know everything. He likely will make some mistakes. So what? We all make mistakes. The important thing is the growth that will come of activity.

I just love that. "So what? We all make mistakes." It's so true. The Lord DID take a risk when he called me to…basically every calling I've ever had. I forget things. I take time to realize what's needed. I say and do things badly. But through these mistakes, I progress and grow closer to the Lord. 

Reading this talk made me want to recommit to letting my children (my own children, and those in my stewardship) join in the work of God. It made me want to make sure I am patient with their mistakes and missteps, and that I give them room to try new things and grow stronger in an environment full of love.

I just gave a talk about this exact thing to the 11-year-olds—about rising up and joining the ranks of "doers" in the church, about becoming partners in the work of God. "Come assist in the work." It was a message given to me by revelation—and I know it was what God wanted these young people to hear. It seems it's what I need to hear too. We need the youth and we need the children and we need every member to join together to do God's work. And as we do it, we as workers, too, feel satisfaction and growth and salvation and joy.

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Novhember

In November the Primary was in charge of a Ward Talent Night. We wanted it to be more of a show-and-tell, where people felt free to share all kinds of talents, not just "performance" ones. We had display tables out and got a good selection of interesting talents—embroidered stockings, paintings, a rocking chair someone had made—someone even makes hats! So that was cool. I hope if we do it next year we'll have even more displays. It's cool to see some of people's hobbies and interests you never get to see otherwise. Sam said he had an easier time talking to people than at any previous ward activity, because there was something so easy to talk about!

Junie and Marigold both did beautiful drawings for the display table. These are Marigold's "feast stations" where she drew all her favorite foods and how you'd put them together into crepes, pancakes, waffles, etc. in a buffet.

I wish I had a closer-up picture of Junie's drawing. It was all different kinds of fruit.

Daisy displayed a bunch of her crocheted food and the Darth Vadar she made for Ziggy. I love the little box of chocolates best!

Malachi set up a table with his playing card collection, and sat and did card tricks for people. It was hugely popular and he was surrounded by admiring throngs all night long. I worry that he has possibly sold his soul to the devil to learn these card tricks? Some of them seem completely impossible without actual magic.

I made ten dozen rolls to go with the soups and chilis people brought. Yum!

Other November moments…

• Ziggy and Gus "nursing" their Caws on the stairs

• Building dams at the lake for a homeschool lesson

• Going through a carwash

• Clementine's tiny pigtails (Sam refused to even acknowledge them as pigtails. He said they were—at most—just "spikes"). But the older girls were very proud of them.

• Clemmie in her tiny gold dress

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Trust Him to accompany them

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Young Women's Session of the April 1999 Conference.

I have been thinking about Teddy's baptism (coming up in February) lately, and so this quote in Sister Carol B. Thomas' talk, from a girl from the Philippines about her baptism, was interesting to me:

“I felt like I had been born again. What an extraordinary feeling of cleanliness, sinlessness! My mother’s tears flowed like a fountain of pearls, and I could tell these were tears of joy! My mother told me sincerely, ‘Lan-Ting, today I am relieved to say I can turn you over to the Lord. I trust He will accompany you along the roads of your life.’”

The first part, about feeling clean and sinless, was of course familiar to me from my own baptism. But I loved the mother's perspective about "Now I can turn you over to the Lord." Obviously our work as mothers is not done once our children are baptized! But it seems so faith-filled and peaceful to have this mother's mindset—trusting God to accompany our children and lead them where they need to go.

I heard another quote from President Nelson that goes along with this, about God's covenant children. It talks about how God loves all his children, but how once we have made covenants with Him, he has a special and binding interest in us that will never end. He will always fulfill his covenant promises, and he will never forget us once we have bound ourselves in that covenant relationship. Here's what President Nelson said:

Once we make a covenant with God, we leave neutral ground forever. God will not abandon His relationship with those who have forged such a bond with Him. In fact, all those who have made a covenant with God have access to a special kind of love and mercy. In the Hebrew language, that covenantal love is called hesed.

Because God has hesed for those who have covenanted with Him, He will love them. He will continue to work with them and offer them opportunities to change. He will forgive them when they repent. And should they stray, He will help them find their way back to Him. 

I think I forget about that covenant tie all too often. I don't forget it for myself! I feel strong and secure in my relationship with Jesus Christ (not that it can't improve! but I just have had too many experiences with His goodness and mercy to doubt Him). But for others, for my older children especially, I worry so much that they will voluntarily choose to let their relationship lapse, and then because they're not doing their part, they won't receive God's blessings. 

All that may still be true. But it comforts me to think that the fact that they have been baptized changes something! Maybe it binds them to God in some special way even when they forget Him for awhile. Or maybe it gives Jesus Christ some kind of power to help them in a way He couldn't without those covenant bonds. I don't know for sure, but I want to choose that kind of trust and relief like Lan-Ting's mother had, to "turn my children over to the Lord and trust Him to accompany them along the roads of their lives"—as he has always accompanied me!

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The rest of the October photos, for crying out loud

 

I can't even remember October. Was it nice? Some of these pictures look like it was nice. But it also snowed sometimes. Oh yes, and we went on millions of hikes, which feels like it was in another life. Anyway. How did all these things happen in one month?

Cuties after bath

How we usually end up going home from church (we all trickle over at different times and for different meetings/responsibilities, the kids mostly walking, but afterwards some of them always want to ride home in the trunk)

Pinky sunset

One of those beautiful Fall days

Cross-country boys eating millions of pancakes after a run

We went on a field trip to a water treatment facility and they gave us little squishy toilets to take home. And, for some reason, Gus fell in love with his. He sleeps with it and carries it around everywhere. Here it is, sitting patiently on the floor behind him while he eats lunch. Sometimes in the house you can hear a cry of "Ziggy took Gus's squishy toilet!"

Gus is (still) obsessed with the doorbell speaker, which he calls the "seeker." This is his favorite viewing spot for it. Note his bright, excited face. "I see the seeker, Mommy!"

Teddy's primary teacher got talking to Teddy about BYU football (Teddy's favorite conversation topic) and the next week he gave us 6 tickets to the game. Seb took Malachi, the three girls, and Teddy to it. So fun! Even though we lost, sad. :(

More windowsill sitting

My cute niece Rachel with me and Clementine

A snug (?) nest on the porch

Super sad matching foxy pajamas

We had a Family Home Evening where we all had to make or write or draw something Halloweeny. This is Teddy's contribution.

The song Malachi composed🙄

Sam's drawing

Junie's pumpkins

Gus's picture. Not pictured: Ziggy's song, which he wrote down on paper with actual music notes and then sang to us. Super cute.

Daisy's graveyard

Goldie's tiny book of Halloween poems

Clemmie in a fuzzy sweatshirt

Family Home Evening where we went to Harmon's and everyone chose something to eat for his or her own dinner. Very fun.

Fancy braid Daisy did in Goldie's hair

Daddy-daughter mini golf

Sweater my mom made a long time ago

Clementine has, more than once, called me on the phone! She goes to our home phone and presses redial (I assume…never having caught her in the act). Then my cell phone rings from "Home" and I answer and hear a bunch of breathing and fumbling, and then a delighted "Hiiiiiii!" and sometimes a few more words. And then a click as she hangs up, entirely pleased with herself. In this picture she had called and then dropped the phone, and Seb helped her talk to me long enough to say "bye."

Learning about surface tension. Gus astonished and delighted at the bubbles.

Weird pretty light through the snow

First (? I think?) snowfall

Turned into a fair amount overnight, enough to play in the next morning

It melted off and the days warmed up a bit right before Halloween. And we had a pleasant Halloween. But then…cold and grey and snow and rain. And nothing warm ever since! (Unless I've forgotten something. Which is likely.)

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