True or False?

Sam's getting ready to teach a class at BYU this semester, and it's had me thinking about tests. So many bad tests . . . luckily the specifics have faded (along with most of the knowledge that was being tested), but didn't you hate teachers who abused the True/False test? Asking questions like, "True or false . . . ALL protozoa can be categorized under the classification protista." Or, "True or false . . . the ONLY time Falstaff makes an appearance in Shakespeare's works is in The Merry Wives of Windsor. Or, "True or false . . . Heber J. Grant said that the family is the MOST important key to our salvation." Please. I hate it when the teacher's whole purpose is to trick you.

Anyway, Abe and Sebby and I sometimes play this game in the car called "the true/false game," and it's lovely. The questions that the boys think of are so funny. And although I sometimes miss being in school, when I reflect on the fact that this is the only kind of test I have to take these days, I am suffused with gratitude. So, without further ado, I present:

A True/False test you are guaranteed to pass: (actual questions by Abe and Seb)

1. (Abe): True or False: There's a merry-go-round in the middle of the road, right in front of you.

2. (Seb): True or False: There's a zoo in the road in front of you, and it's made of plastic.

3. (Abe): True or False: There's an elephant in the road, and it's coming right towards us, and it's going to get right in our car.

4. (Seb): True or False: There's an elephant in our car right now, and it's made of plastic.

5. (Abe): True or False: There's a big letter Z on the mountain.

6. (Seb): True or False: That Y on the mountain is made of white.

7. (Abe): True or False: There's a big, huge, monkey sitting on the seat, and it's eating a banana, and it's from the zoo, and it's going to be our monkey for the rest of the whole world.

8. (Seb): True or False: My brown monkey is blue.

9. (Abe): True or False: The whole world is blue.

(End, accompanied by raucous laughter)


  1. well that cracked me up. Your boys are so funny! It seems like car time is when Max always comes up with the craziest stuff too.
    And I'm with you. No more cruddy true/false tests. I'll take little boy ones anytime though.

  2. That's a game we'll have to try. I like how you REMEMBER and include funny things your kids say. I can never remember funny anecdotes like that and it makes me feel like I'm a crappy mom. Why can't I remember what my kids said today, but I can tell you how much I paid for a shirt two years ago?
    Also, with Sam teaching a class at BYU I'm glad he's finally becoming who I expected you to marry: a professor. When you started dating him all those years ago it shattered the dream I had for you to marry some brainy professor. Looks like he's growing into the part. It's kind of like that book, "The Secret" where I just put it out into the universe that I wanted you to marry a professor, and it's finally coming back to me.
    Next, I think I'll put out into the universe that I'd like you to inherit an elephant made of plastic that can fit into your car.

  3. What a fun post! I especially like the zoo in the road in front of you that's made of plastic. Your boys are so creative. We have to play this game now--we spend most of our driving listening to/singing with Disney songs, but I can only handle so much "Supercalifragelisticexpialidocious."


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