Needed

As if it weren't enough to have three boys pulling on my hand and saying "Mommmee?" at me all day (okay, one of them doesn't actually say that--but he definitely cries at me in a meaningful manner)---not to mention being the resident authority on all kinds of household-ly details ("How much soap do I put in the washing machine?" "Where does the pie pan go?" "Does this cup need washing?" "Do we have any more toilet paper?")---there are now some other boys here (really boys, they look about 17--one still has braces and the other one has his poor scrawny chest on display and is hugging his unlit cigarette to him fiercely, like a security blanket) moving the pile of dirt off of the street and into our yard.* Which is good.** But they keep ringing the doorbell. The cigarette one stands there awkwardly while the braces one mumbles, "Hey, sorry to bother you . . . "

"Yes?" I say.
Braces: Um . . . do you know, do you have any of that um, brown hose stuff?
Me: You mean the drip line?
Braces: Yeah, that stuff there [gestures feebly]
Me: No. Don't you have any?
Braces: Um yeah, we would have to go to the store and just get some, so, I was wondering if you had some.
Me: No, sorry.
Braces: Oh, okay.

20 minutes later.

Ding-dong!
Me: Hi! What's going on?
Cigarette: [averts eyes]
Braces: Um hi, we were just wondering, do you have any more of that brown bark stuff?
Me: The mulch?
Braces: Yeah, that mulch stuff on top there [gestures feebly].
Me: Well, no. Our builder is the one that put in the front landscape, so we don't really have any of those supplies.
Braces: Oh, okay.

20 minutes later.

Ding-dong!
*I promise I am not making this up!!*
Me: Oh, hey guys!
Cigarette: [gazes across street]
Braces: Hey, sorry to keep bothering you.
Me: No, that's okay. What do you need?
Braces: I was just wondering, um, do you need the dirt on, like, both sides of your house?
Me: Yes, that's right.
Braces: So, like, that side, and then that side too? [gestures feebly]
Me: Yeah, we need it everywhere that the drip line goes. Just basically in our whole yard. Both sides.
Braces: Okay, I was just, uh, trying to make sure I got everything, 'cause I keep forgetting stuff, so . . . I just wanted to make sure.

They reminded me of two little kids trying to get out of going to bed or something [now how would I know about that?]. "I need onnnne more drink!" "I just need to go to the bathroom!" etc. In fact I tried to go outside and bring them a drink, but now they seem to have disappeared. Hmmm.

Anyway, it's nice to be needed. Right?

*That must be the longest sentence ever.
**"To break up lengthy sections of prose, vary your sentence lengths." English minor to the rescue!!